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2002-09-11 - 10:20 a.m. I had to go back and read what I wrote on September 11 last year. I did not write a thing. I think the shock and grief were too strong on that day. I am feeling a little weird today as well. I have a hard time watching stuff on tv because I could cry and cry. It is good to reflect, but parts of me want to move on. I cannot imagine living in a country where things like this happen frequently - do you eventually become numb, just to cancel out the pain? I also feel weird because part of me is sad for all the loss, but part of me is so excited to start our windows and siding tomorrow that I could wet my pants. I hope those who are grieving today forgive me for the mixed feelings I have. I find it a weird coincidence that last year Tuesdays were my day off so I was home when it all happened, and now Wednesday is my day off, so I am home able to watch the aftermath. Well, I must go and finish getting the house ready. I will write more later when I get out of the weird feelings 9/11 evokes. By the way, I do feel that reflection is good - I will be spending a lot of time today counting my blessings, kissing my husband, talking to friends, loving and living as much as possible. Until later.
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